Check out Thefuntheory.com, a site that aims to prove that “fun is the easiest way to change people’s behavior for the better.” Here’s my favorite one:

Obviously, this works well with kids too. According to a New York Times article about the Tools of the Mind program, which is meant to promote self-regulation:

“[C]hildren acting out a dramatic scene can control their impulses much better than they can in nonplay situations. In one experiment, 4-year-old children were first asked to stand still for as long as they could. They typically did not make it past a minute. But when the kids played a make-believe game in which they were guards at a factory, they were able to stand at attention for more than four minutes.”

Remember how much more willing you were to eat your veggies when they were laid out in the shape of a funny face? Dropping your sister off at school is so much more exciting when you pretend you are going on a road trip. And, of course, clean-up time always goes more smoothly when you turn it into a race to see who can do their assigned task fastest.

Got any suggestions to make routine or unpleasant tasks go more smoothly by adding a bit of fun?

Gretchen Rubin at the Happiness Project blog has a great post about fun that has interesting implications for planning your family’s leisure time.

Gretchen divides fun into three types: challenging, accommodating, and relaxing.  Challenging fun requires you to put in a fair amount of effort to learn something new or work towards a long-term goal, such as learning to play golf. Accommodating fun, involves doing an activity with other people that takes account of what the others will enjoy, such as taking your kids to the zoo. Finally, relaxing fun involves little effort or planning, such as watching TV.

Gretchen explains that challenging and accommodating fun provide the most benefits but also require the most effort:

“Challenging fun and accommodating fun, over the long term, bring more happiness, because they’re sources of those elements that make people happiest: strong personal bonds, mastery, an atmosphere of growth. Relaxing fun tends to be passive—by design.”

But (and there is a but) there’s a kicker: ”while we get more out of challenging fun and accommodating fun, we also must put more into it.”

Being cognizant of these differences can help you be more mindful of the activities you and your kids choose to do, both individually, and as a family. To sneak in more challenging and accommodating fun, Gretchen recommends keeping an eye open for activities that involve:

 learning to do something new
 visiting new places (even if it’s just a new store)
 getting together with other people, whether with friends or strangers

Hopefully, you’ll be getting a nice balance of different kinds of fun.  If you find that all or most of the fun in your house is of the relaxing variety, you may want to try to mix it up a bit – even if it’s just in small ways.

Homework is one of the top five issues that constantly come up for parents and their children. The “homework meltdown” is a common event in homes, complete with tears, power struggles and yelling that can last well into the evening and carry over in the form of hurt feelings, shame and frustration.

In our busy lives, with programs, multiple commitments, video games and individual electronic devices we can become distanced from one another. It is so important to reconnect and enjoy one another more, I often find that homework battles can be an obstacle to this and an incredible stressor for parents and children. With the homework battle taking up most of the night, this scenario is repeated throughout the week.

There are educational benefits to homework such as establishing good work habits and solidifying concepts but that tends to work for students who are positive and more enthusiastic about homework. For others, homework can be a huge source of anxiety, fighting and a real battle ground that distances parents and children, and causes kids to associate stress and upset with learning. When you add in after-school activities, homework often gets crammed in later in the evening when children and tired and cranky.

As parents, our own concerns and worries about our children’s success often turns this into an explosive combination. For children who have learning disabilities, ADHD, anxiety, homework is just another time of the day where they may feel incompetent. Focusing on activities that make them happy and build self esteem, such as music, drama, sports programs, or play time, can be far more beneficial and protective. Very little is learned and retained when one is in a heightened level of stress.

Homework does not have to end in tears and fighting. It is possible to find balance and manage negative homework behavior. It is possible to work towards establishing homework time as a positive learning experience.

Homework Tips for Parents

* Stick to the your school’s guidelines on how long children should spend on homework and do no more than that (unless your child is happy and motivated to continue).

* If very little gets done, write a note to the teacher stating that homework time did not go well and this was all that is
accomplished.

* Never get in a homework battle, no one wins.

* Try to organize a homework buddy–an older child in the neighborhood who can help your child at homework time.

* Empathize with your child about how they are feeling before lecturing them on why homework is important.

* Stay neutral–sometimes kids use power struggles to avoid the work. If you are eager to oblige with an argument you will become part of the avoidance pattern.

* Be careful about negative consequences for not doing homework. If you must consequence, keep it immediate and stick to what you say, i.e. no TV that same evening.

* Try to use positive rewards for good choices and good work habits. Maybe a fun activity you can share together. This can help create good habits and change negative patterns.

* Support the teacher; try not to talk about how there is too much homework. It is important that your child see you supporting the school.